"[T]here is no link whatsoever between homosexuality and pedophilia in this book. Hamlet's father, in the book, is a pedophile, period. I don't show him being even slightly attracted to adults of either sex. It is the reviewer, not me, who has asserted this link, which I would not and did not make."
1. Regardless, that is about as stupid a take on the story as you could possibly take...HORATIO killing the King? Congrats--you have just managed to not only introduce a plot point that flies in the face of about a DOZEN facts of the actual book (for one, Claudius confessing to God and the audience that he DID kill the King) but undermine half of the emotional and thematic weight that is put behind the characters...Hamlet is no longer taking a just revenge and yet struggling with it due to his moral precepts and his own psyche, and he's no longer clever enough to get his proof Claudius is the killer via The Mousetrap play, he's just a raving madman who sees ghosts that apparently lie to him and kills the wrong person...er, kills the wrong person TWICE (after all, he does stab Polonius in error.) ;) Suddenly, Claudius is blameless, and all his motivations for why he would have wanted to kill the king--including the possibility that he did it partially because he loved Gertrude--is gone. Gertrude is suddenly completely pointless. So are Polonius, Laertes, Ophelia, Rosencrantz, and Guildenstern. And, of course, Horatio doing not only makes NO sense, but it takes what was essentially the audience's link into Hamlet's mind, the one he speaks several of his most intimate and famous thoughts to, the one person he counts as a friend, and turns him into the murderer, AND turns Hamlet's father, who was supposed to have been so beloved and great that we should feel on Hamlet's side and want to see him avenge his foul and most unnatural murder, into a molesting pedophile. WELL DONE! You have successfully corrupted and missed the point of nearly every single last character and plot point of the play for the purpose of some absurd fan-fiction!
2. I obviously haven't read it--and I have no intention of ever doing so, obviously--but I will say that given what apparently is Scott Card's stance on homosexuality and how he seems to be viscerally against it...it's one of those situations where, for all I know, he could be truthful and didn't mean or intend to make the King a "gay" pedophile, but his anti-gay stance does allow for that creeping interpretation to come in and be up for debate.
3. "I don't show him even slightly being attracted to adults of either sex."
...Gertrude...?
And if he's molesting Horatio and attracted to him as a child...ummm...
Hamlet's Father being attracted to Horatio as a child is no better...actually, that's far, far, FAR WORSE--that's why such a disgusting action is considered DESPICABLE and AGAINST THE LAW.
And the character not only has no basis for this sort of fan-fiction twist, again, it works completely the opposite way, as, well, he was married to Gertrude! You could argue "he wasn't actually attracted to her," but there's no textual evidence for that, and that certainly doesn't seem to be what is intended or implied in the original play...hell, he even appears again to Hamlet (or else he psychologically manifests to Hamlet, if we're to go the Freudian route) in Act III just after he's killed Polonius and is berating his mother and tells him to stop it and leave her be...maybe that wasn't out of love for his old wife, but that's AT LEAST more of a suggestion that he was attracted to Gertrude than ANY non-existent plot point that suggests that he wouldn't be.
And I'll leave it there before it becomes an essay, as frankly, I could go on and on about this (and no one would care, but I suspect everyone believes I could do such a damned silly thing, such is my nerd-knowledge of Shakespeare and especially THAT play.)
But one last thing, lest someone say the following:
"It's an adaptation, Obi, or a fictional take on the story, you just want to seal 'Hamlet' off forever and not allow new interpretations and versions to come out."
Not at all--I LOVE "Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead."
THAT was smart.
THAT was brilliantly done.
THAT was done without blatantly contradicting the basic plot points of the play.
THAT was done for the BENEFIT of the work as well, giving added depth and new-found recognition to R&G, and a sort of recognition you COULD see actually working in the context of the play, that these characters ARE so off to the side and such pawns in this larger scheme that Stoppard's take is not only allowable, it makes sense given the historical and textual context of both works, and marries his new ideas and the ideas and plot of the old one perfectly.
THIS...this is a fan-fiction that ignores...pretty much everything, and is nonsensical and BAD.
"But Obi, you haven't even read--"
Just from his own explanation I've already listed about a dozen glaring problems with this idea and why it in no way works.