First of all, as stated before, the game was small (50 pt buy in) and the outcome insignificant, and I have been satisfied by finding a means to avert the same problem in the future (one of my goals with the thread) by emailing the moderators.
I would like to clerify my position. As soon as russia and I (austria) began to work together, my focus was on the stalemate line with france. I kept a very close eye on how he could break it, and made sure that as he pressed further east, I was there first. Although i didnt have the crucial army in sevastopol (completing the tactical stalemate line) until near the end of the game, I was watching when france could exploit this last crack, and made sure to beat him to the edge of the stalemate.
Effectively, I felt that quite a few of the last years I had reached a stalemate, and in the end I had reached a true tactical stalemate. If france truly did not see this, then it is fine for him to physically check (although i would think it would be quicker and easier to consider the outcome instead of wait an hour to live it - my moves were constant, it would be easy to determine if they could be broken)
However, my one hesitation in accepting france's statement of ignorance of the stalemate is why he kept attacking with his units (namely the fleets) where their was no progress for what i guess to be 10 years (i dont remember exactly how long). The fact is that after 5 it should have been extremely clear that we had a stalemate in the south, and while he may want to continue the fight in the north, continuing attacking in the south shows that he was trying to exploit a misorder. Here at least he should have ordered support holds to be in the spirit of the game, as any variation of our moves would clearly be a misorder and should not be taken advantage of.