I would destroy the world, nuclear missiles = win

In addition:

-"Duck Soup," "Animal Crackers," "A Night at the Opera," and AT LEAST one other Marx Bros. movie OR ten Three Stooges Shorts (one MUST be "Disorder in the Court" and at least 7 MUST feature Curly) are REQUIRED VIEWING

-Multiple spouses are allowed (after all, to quote Captain Sapulding on hearing "But that's bigomy!" "Yes, and that's big of me, too- I'm tired of these single marriages. They were good enough for your grandmother, but who wants to marry your grandmother- no one, not even your grandfather."

-The following changes to Late Night TV are in effect:

+Conan goes back to Late Late Night where he belongs (and does well enough) and he and Craig Ferguson are the official people in that slot

+The Jimmys Fallon and Kimmel are hereby out, the former for having talent but not the late night swagger, and the latter for having a drunken swagger but no talent

+David Letterman is in the 11:30 slot forever, and Jay Leno leaves 10:00 and does standup on other shows from now on

+Johnny Carson is the official King of Late Night, and his shows are moved to 10:30, so more foks can see him, as even his reruns are better than most comedy today. Thus, the official rolecall goes Carson-Letterman-Ferguson/Conan

+Colbert and Stewart keep their jobs, but are on at 8:00 and 9:00 to lead into Johnny

And yes, Acomist, Sylvania MUST go, along with Neverland ranch and that place by the freeway that reeks so when you're dribing by in rush hour and you get stuck you're smelling manure for half an hour

You're pretending to rule a country and all you can think of is to rearrange late night TV? Can't you already do that with the Internet?

Are you just trying to make another late night tv thread but disguising it as a make your own country thread?

My only law: Do not obey this law.

HEY NOW, TV is a VITAL part of any nation, especially in Freedonia!

(If there's nothing good on, the people will have to read instead, and that'll be national disaster, as like many Americans, Freedonians are highly illeterate and borish. So, no TV, they'll have to learn, and if they DO learn anything, I'm out of a job soon enough!)

;)

For my NEXT acts:

-"Obesity" and "Anorexia" are hereby outlawed words: fat and skinny are two sids of the same paranoia, so there's no need for name-calling. Any:
-fat person calling a thin person "Anorexic" must go a full hour without any sweets
-thin person calling a fat person "Obese" must go a full hour eating JUST sweets
-fat person calling a fat person far or a thin person calling a thin person thin must pe made to stop, look at themselves in the mirror, and no dessert, either

Now, as for the national finances, we are reviving Trickle-Down Theory- whatever we make as a surlus trickles down into the sewers- and all national leaders get at least 5% (except me, I get 15%.)

And my next law, I call it the "Centurian Law":

"Any person(s) who does not understand a humorous thread and a silly premise when he sees one, particularly if it is satire is staring him the face and blowing a rasberry, is hereby decreed a very sorry case indeed- and needs to watch a good few hours of some Groucho or Curly to lighten up- this place is bad enough without us having to actually RUN the nation!"

"You're pretending to rule a country and all you can think of is to rearrange late night TV?"

Somehow, this comment totally cracked me up :D

I still say it's not so absurd- if Obama can spend like water and the Republicans can try and drown the country out of spite, can't I have Johnny Carson on before Dave, and Concan back to battling with Craig (I like Craig, but the competition made it better).)

We're an anarco-sydicalist commune and I think we should make Johnny Carson president, Letterman head of the CIA (and other funny business) and banish Conan to Sylvania... after we cover his mouth with a piece of duct tape and put the cigar up his nose.

No warfare?!? You may as well shoot the fun right now.

I'd make Tottenham and Wigan replay their weekend fixture. Wigan's 'goal' had more than a hint of handball about it.

France's victory over Ireland last week should be allowed to stand. A replay would be too expensive.

My nation would run on all eco friendly energy sources and its top export would be puppies!

ok no
#1 no more boy bands

My country wouuld just be a simple, quiet, agricultural nation similar to Poland Commonwealth and a well trained defensive army.

1. All media to explain and contextualize risks, and only print science articles based on science.

2. Everyone would understand the meaning of the word theory, as in 'Theory of Gravity'

3. Z-list celeb magazines would be banned

4. As would the Daily Mail

5. Global warming is not science.

Ok, I was not the only one who made fun of you, yet I'm the only one to get a law. Your society is not just.

I like the outlawing of boy bands- boy bands are hereby banned from Freedonia! (except, of course, for The Beatles, who are really not a boy band or a pop band or a rock band but rather just plain awesome.)

Z-list celeb magazines? I'd ban all C-list celebrities and down (C-listers being John and Kate and their Eight and other reality TV "stars," Mike Tyson now that he's gon from being Iron to just plain Tirin', and so on...)

And finally-

I hereby decree that all fans of futbol and football shall make peace and learn to love both their game and the other one.

So, futbol fans, please feel free to ask and learn about the ways of the NFL and NCAA, the West Coast Offense and the Steel Curtain, what teams are classy (Steelers, Packers, Bears Dolphins) were great but have now fallen on hard times (Bills, my 49ers, Cowboys) and what teams are just as dirty as any futbol or Olympic team, even Germany (Raiders before they became laughingstocks, Patriots.)

And futbol fans, please expalin to me YOUR game- and why your clock goes UP rather than DOWN so I'm confused on the time, why teams wear such silly striped shorts, and why games can't end in scores higher than 1-0 or at best 3-2 (WHY???)

And no, my society is not just, Centurian- that's why it's Freedonia, didn't you ever hear the great Rufus T. Firefly say:

"If any form of pleasure is exhibited, report it to me and it will be prohibited, so I say, so shall it be- this is the land of the 'free!'"

;)

@ Vitus - Fail vs Law 1. Understanding the drivers of climate change (solar cycle etc) is Science. The debate about whether or not man-made factors are having an influence on this is science. Saying anthropomorphic climate change is 100% true or false is Not science.

@obiwan - Law 6 - only one sport may call itself football, and that is the one codifed in 1853 in Sheffield. The US sport, fine though it is, must find a new name to more accurately reflect how the ball is moved about the pitch. Personally, I vote for chuckycathcyrunnyball :)

I'll explain football happily to you, as you understand that the Dolphins are indeed cool, but we should take it out of the this thread :)

Law 7: Maths has an s on the end.
Law 8: Sport does not
Law 9: Cover versions (even the good ones) are banned - there are far too many truely awful abominations out there
Law 10: As is Michael Bay or Roland Emmerich ever making a film ever, ever, ever again

The nation of Freedonia does not recognize the 1853 codification in Sheffield- I may not live there, but I've heard it's a dirty, nasty place, sort of like if Los Angeles met Detroit and the two just merged until everything was dirtier, gloomier, and all the bars were full but half the glasses were sadly empty...

Obiwan - you cast aspersions at the fine city of my father's birth! It is a fine city, built on 7 hills (like Rome), home to both the finest football team in the world, in their fine city centre stadium (and unfortunately, their fowl pocine 'rivals' from the north of the city).

It is the de facto capital of Freedonia as far as I'm concerned!

11. Freedonia doesn't recognise a 'World Champion' when the 'championship' is only played by teams from one or two nations

The claim that soccer is the oldest codified football game is dubious.
The Sheffield football club was founded in 1857, and the Football Association 1863.
The oldest documented club is the Dublin University Football Club (Rugby) in 1854.
And a couple of other Rugby clubs claim an even earlier beginning.
The Melbourne Football Club (Australian Rules Football - derived from Rugby) was founded in 1859, with several other (still existent) teams forming the same year.
All Football games stem from the football games played at English public schools, with each school playing their own rules. Some allowed hand contact with the ball and some did not.
In some respects I think Rugby Football(as a codified sport) has the best claim - with American Rules, Canadian Rules and Australian Rules pretty much a direct descendant of this game.

One interesting aside, and I don't know the truth of it. I have heard that the origin of the term football is to with the fact the game is played on foot (as opposed to on horseback), with it the origins of this term going back to ancient times.

Very well- so shall we settle this Falling Out Over the Footballs:

The current champions from each sport shall meet!

For US football, that means the Pittsburg Steelers!

And for the other one... well, we can't do it internationally, that's just a folly, too many teams, so let's take the champion of the British League, whoever they are, since we have mainly Americans and Brits here.

So, Englishmen- who are your current champions of your football?

They and the Steelers shall meet, and, to decide who gets to keep the title of football, they will square of in a deadly...

Recreation of an American Revoltion battle (Steelers as the Minutemen, and your team as the Red Coats) complete with b-b-gun loaded muskets!

I like it...

So- who is it, England?

(And really, about Sheffield? I heard it was a dingy place... hmmm... must be cold there if it's in the north...)

Manchester United (sadly) but next year chelsea shall reign supreme!

www.nationstates.net

Chelsea? Sorry, but what sort of name for a team is "Chelsea?"

(And I thought naming a team after your state itself, the Texans, was weird...)

VERY WELL!

Manchester United shall don the red coats, the Pittsburgh Steelers shall wear the blue vests and tricorner hats, and so shall this Football Revolution be fought!