I would go back in time and ride on a dinosaur.

I would go back in time and become a third world dictator.

Probably nothing different then now being that a, I don't live in the US and b, I'd be happier with a socialist country anyways. Besides it would be interesting to see how communism works in peace time

I'd be much happier.

Do you mean, actually controlled, like the US was a satellite, or we were still in the Cold War. Cause, the first would probably suck, but the latter definitely would.

Well, I'd be very unhappy driving a crappy car, working a dead-end job, having shoddy clothes, riding in airplanes that are prone to crashing. very unhappy, and afraid for my safety. I'd move to Brazil or Argentina

FUCK USSR.
I'd first achieve a high rank in the USSR system.
Than I'd kill the president, and become president, and rule the world.

I'd probably be dead, as the Soviet health care system wasn't exactly optimized to care for people with cronic conditions like type one diabetes.

As for what I'd do, that's far too broad of a question. Did they take over the US in my lifetime? I'd probably have died during the invasion, under the logic that since I was a dead man anyway, I may as well take a few Russians with me.

If it had happened in the 1950s, I would be a vastly different person. I would have grown up in a nation that controlled information to the point where 'thinking outside the box' would be extraordinarily challenging, due to a lack of differing viewpoints to consider. My inquisitive nature and lack of comfort with the party line would have gotten me flagged before I ever left high school, so the chance of getting out of a dead end job would be nil. I doubtlessly would have joined the Party, since it was pretty much mandatory, but I would have sat in the back and shut up.

So, before my diabetes killed me, I would have worked as a retail clerk, drank a lot, and thought forbidden thoughts in the dark... but ultimately died, lonely and alone.

I love how people romanticize the past and kinda forget the downsides. Like pretending the 1950s were just full of optimism and happiness... which they may have been, as long as you were a white male.

There was a reason people didn't tend to flow into the socialist paradise East Germany was, and that refugees tended to flow the other way... until the wall went up. And people still *died* trying to get over that Wall.

'Border control' in the United States has been focused on keeping people out, and in the USSR it was focused on keeping people in.

But let's not let facts confuse the issue. I'm sure the United Soviet Socialist States of America would have been a shining beacon of peace and socialist brotherhood, where everyone worked like beavers for the common good and the complete lack of a check on the powers of the central government *never* ended up being abused.

I would love it. Socialism would have had a good chance of working if there was much less military spending. At times during the Cold War, the USSR was spending 2/3 of its GDP on weapons. In the scenario posited in this thread, the Cold War has ended in a Soviet victory, so far greater resources would be available for meeting the needs and wants of the populace.

*snort* you're either assuming that there wouldn't be an equivalent of the 'War on Terror' to piss money away in or that the USSR would just slaughter everyone in the middle east. Which is it?

Seriously, if you want to postulate the victory of the USSR, you'd have to postulate the spread of their *system*. After all, if it worked to defeat the West it must obviously *work*, so there wouldn't be any need to 'reform' the little warts like the KGB and the complete lack of freedom to criticize the government.

So if that's how you want to live, whatever's clever - but you're fucking nuts if you think it'd be any kind of paradise

It would be like a chapter out of 'Red Plenty'.

Hmmm. Interesting book, reading the summary.

@ stratagos: "you're either assuming that there wouldn't be an equivalent of the 'War on Terror' to piss money away in or that the USSR would just slaughter everyone in the middle east. Which is it?"

With the Cold War over and the USSR ruling the territory of the USA, the USA would no longer prop up Israel. The Israeli government would thus have no choice but to end its current policy of fucking on the Palestinians. Lebanon, Syria and other countries in Israel's vicinity would become much more stable, and over time the problem of the Middle East would diminish.

And this explains Chechnya... how?

Yeah the USSR was pretty good at enforcing stability against the wishes of its client states. That is one plus for totalitarian governments; they tend to be pretty good at scaring their citizens into behaving.

with regard to the problem of the Middle East diminishing, how do you know that it wouldn't just reverse? Why wouldn't the War on Terror be against the zionists? Would they be put down with the iron fist of the Soviets? Is that why the problem would diminish?

Because a government that doesn't need to keep begging for re-election every four years does not need to resort to something like the "war on terror" to control its citizens.

@ stratagos: "And this explains Chechnya... how?"

Epic fail.

The USSR ceased to exist in 1991.
The first Chechen War began in 1994.

This may come as a shocker to you, Jamie, but I'm aware of that.

What kicked off the war was the Chechens basically saying 'We want out of here' when the rest of the Union broke up, and Russia wanted to keep them.

Of course, they would not have been able to do this if the Red Army had not faced so many problems past 1991.... which means the Red Army would need to maintain it's current size, or face chunks of the nation seceeding right and left.

So, there go the defense savings.

Additionally, you still are singing praises of the great socialist experiment, but continue to ignore the repressive means the Soviets kept their nation together. Will you confirm that you're ok with the concept of the KGB watching your every move? After all, you have nothing to fear if you haven't done anything wrong... right?

@ stratagos: "So, there go the defense savings."

Not quite. Why would they still require nukes?

"Well, I'd be very unhappy driving a crappy car, working a dead-end job, having shoddy clothes, riding in airplanes that are prone to crashing. very unhappy, and afraid for my safety. I'd move to Brazil or Argentina."

Hold on. You'd be afraid for your safety so you'd move to Brazil, one of the violent crime capitals of the world? Makes perfect sense...

According to what I'm seeing online, the US spends about $50 billion on nukes, out of about $800 billion - so while there will be savings, we're not talking world-shattering savings... and keep in mind that if there is one giant nanny state, there's no one to borrow cash from, so that $52 billion in savings needs to be counted out of the hundreds of billions we borrow.

And while I doubt the USSR would keep thousands of RVs, I strongly doubt they'd get completely rid of them, if for no other reason that the general in charge is going to want to keep his portion of the budget/influence/whatever

Sorry Putin, I was just trying to think of a non-aligned country during the cold war and that was the first one I thought of. The point is I would move out of the country.

"There was a reason people didn't tend to flow into the socialist paradise East Germany was, and that refugees tended to flow the other way... until the wall went up. And people still *died* trying to get over that Wall."

The people who 'fled' of course had no problem exploiting the GDR's free high quality education system and then used those skills to go find lucrative jobs dangled before their eyes by the re-Nazified Bonn government. There would have been a united democratic Germany had the Soviets prevailed, instead the West split up Germany, rearmed their sector of it (with nukes!), made it a member of NATO, and put ex-Nazis in positions of power, all in contradiction of the Potsdam agreement.

The Wall prevented World War III. Heck, even JFK said the wall was a "hell of a lot better than war"Notice that after the Wall was built, the constant tensions in Berlin were reduced. West Germany stopped calling for annexing all of the East with military force. The East Germans proposed entry permits to be issued for West Berliners to visit the East, so there was no need to climb over the wall. But who closed those permit stations by force? The Bonn government.

"The people who 'fled' of course had no problem exploiting the GDR's free high quality education system and then used those skills to go find lucrative jobs dangled before their eyes by the re-Nazified Bonn government. "

Evidence?

"Than I'd kill the president, and become president, and rule the world."

The president of what? Rotary club? The USSR didn't have a President. Well I suppose Gorbachov created the position for a few months in 1990. But do we really count Gorbachov?

If the GDR was so awesome, why were they so far behind West Germany at reunification? I mean, they had free high quality education...

@Putin - http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_President_of_the_Russian_Federation