The_articulated
- Rank: Member
- Position: 15057/21589 (top 70%)
- Available points: 110
- Points in play: 0
- Total points: 110
- Game messages: 262
- All Game stats:
- Won: 1 ( 10% )
- Drawn: 1 ( 10% )
- Survived: 2 ( 20% )
- Defeated: 6 ( 60% )
- Total (finished): 10
- Civil disorder: 2
- Civil disorders taken over: 3
- Classic:
- Survived: 1 ( 25% )
- Defeated: 3 ( 75% )
- Total (finished): 4
- Classic Press:
- Survived: 1 ( 33% )
- Defeated: 2 ( 67% )
- Total (finished): 3
- Classic Gunboat:
- Defeated: 1 ( 100% )
- Total (finished): 1
- Classic Ranked:
- Survived: 1 ( 25% )
- Defeated: 3 ( 75% )
- Total (finished): 4
- Variant stats:
- Won: 1 ( 17% )
- Drawn: 1 ( 17% )
- Survived: 1 ( 17% )
- Defeated: 3 ( 50% )
- Total (finished): 6
- Reliability:
- Reliability rating: 100%
"Private Baldrick: No, the thing is: The way I see it, these days there's a war on, right? and, ages ago, there wasn't a war on, right? So, there must have been a moment when there not being a war on went away, right? and there being a war on came along. So, what I want to know is: How did we get from the one case of affairs to the other case of affairs?
Captain Blackadder: Do you mean "How did the war start?"
Lieutenant George: The war started because of the vile Hun and his villainous empire- building.
Captain Blackadder: George, the British Empire at present covers a quarter of the globe, while the German Empire consists of a small sausage factory in Tanganiki. I hardly think that we can be entirely absolved of blame on the imperialistic front.
Lieutenant George: Oh, no, sir, absolutely not.
[aside, to Baldrick]
Lieutenant George: [He's] Mad as a bicycle!
Private Baldrick: I heard that it started when a bloke called Archie Duke shot an ostrich 'cause he was hungry.
Captain Blackadder: I think you mean it started when the Archduke of Austro-Hungary got shot.
Private Baldrick: Nah, there was definitely an ostrich involved, sir.
Captain Blackadder: Well, possibly. But the real reason for the whole thing was that it was too much effort not to have a war.
Lieutenant George: By Gum, this is interesting. I always loved history. The Battle of Hastings, Henry VIII and his six knives, all that.
Captain Blackadder: You see, Baldrick, in order to prevent war in Europe, two superblocs developed: us, the French and the Russians on one side, and the Germans and Austro-Hungary on the other. The idea was to have two vast opposing armies, each acting as the other's deterrent. That way there could never be a war.
Private Baldrick: But, this is a sort of a war, isn't it, sir?
Captain Blackadder: Yes, that's right. You see, there was a tiny flaw in the plan.
Private Baldrick: What was that, sir?
Captain Blackadder: It was bollocks.
Private Baldrick: So the poor old ostrich died for nothing then"
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- User ID#: 60573