FIrst, the Ban and Silence buttons are waaay too close together. Somebody needs to fix that.

The mods have the ability to hijack your webcam and look at you. Their main means of catching multi-accounters is looking at them and seeing if they’re the same person. This is what happened to poor Sandgoose. If you don’t have a webcam, you are assumed to be a multi and banned accordingly. Likewise if you’re extremely ugly and the mods don’t want to risk having to look at you again. This is also used for less noble purposes. It is why there are so few female users, and why Celticfox quit shortly after learning the full scope of mod powers.

There is some excellent cheating-deterrence software that imparts subliminal messages on the reader each time a page is opened. For the most part, these consist of simple messages instructing users not to cheat, but when someone is playing a game with a moderator, the messages are also used to encourage people to help them fare better in those games.

There’s a software package entitled “DRONE01” that doesn’t seem to work on a local install. As best as I can tell, the webdip server has remote access to some sort of destructive military technology. A moderator can simply pick a user and the program will cross-reference the name with the webDip user map and obliterate wherever that user might have claimed to live. It seems older versions simply traced IP addresses but this was cancelled after two nefarious cheaters took advantage of Malaysian Airlines’ in-flight wifi and several global superpowers began to get suspicious.

It seems that there is a network of automated accounts set to +1 posts by moderators. This explains quite a bit.

This is only discussed indirectly in the code’s comments, but it seems as though the entire mod team takes a yearly retreat, funded by the generous donations of the users. They travel to the Congo and hunt human beings for sport, culminating in a large feast wherein they devour the flesh of their fresh prey. User Norbert discovered this and attempted to alert the community, but his urgency was misinterpreted as a joke and he was banned before he could clarify.

President Eden is an artificial intelligence hellbent on world domination. His username is an attempt to hide in plain sight.


That’s about it, there are a few other powers that you’d expect the mods to have. They have to beat four levels of Mrs. Pac-Man before silencing a forum thread to prove sobriety to avoid a repeat of the Thucydides incident of ‘09. They can read your in game messages. They can impersonate users on the forums, but only the ones with Silver donator status. Surprisingly, they can’t read private messages (I guess that’s what “private” means), so cheaters should go on using those to communicate in secret.

I expect I’ll be banned for this, and I think that’s reasonable. Hopefully a few of you will be able to read it all before they remove my post. I hope this proves that the moderators are completely reasonable and actually do have the best interests of the community at heart, so even when we disagree with their decisions, we should understand that at least their hearts are in the right place.

I am a leaf on the wind; watch how I soar.