Wait ice cream only wins if its in a waffle cone.

Bo loves creampies

Who doesn't?

I'll give you this - ice cream makes all those other desserts better. Yes, even donuts.

Capt brads wife makes nice pies according to him combined with BB's last post 3 above this one I have concerns as to what "type " of parties captt Brad is offering his wifes pie at ??

i think I might go a cookie myself...I do love nice warm fresh cookies..

of course Pavlova the goddess of desserts could not be included as that would be unamerican..and the Pav would win hands down..

Apologies to those who have never had one ...

Pie is basically the essence of life itself. Pie above all.

I'm just reading now what others wrote and I honestly believe most of you deserve to spend your life in a labour camp for that kind of talk. Cookies? Brownies? CUTLERY? Either your heads are so far up your asses that you are unable to experience taste, or you have never eaten a proper pie because pies are one of the greatest achievements of human kind and the crown jewel of desserts. All our culinary progress has lead to pies.

Tom Bombadil and Praetorian give clear reasons why cookies win. Pie, on an individual level, is arguably better than cookies. However, pie can also be underwhelming. I've had bad pie. Too many things can go wrong with pie. Bad crust, bad filling. Too many variables. Cake never lives up to the hype and really needs to bring it's A game more often. For every good piece of cake I've had there have been four pieces of lackluster cake. Brownies? Seriously? It's just pretend pseudo-cake. Donuts? While the donut place by my house has an amazing peanut butter donut I can't even tell you how many crap donuts I've had. The fact that the donut crowd holds Krispy Kreme up as the gold standard of donuts should say everything about how well the donut crowd can judge things.

Yes, the best pie in the world is possibly better than the best cookie. However, as Tom said above cookies are the stronger team. Cookies are smaller. Bite size, travel capable, enjoyable warm or cold, delicious crunchy or chewy, frosted, with chocolate, with peanut butter, toffee, shortbread... C'mon cretins! It's everything you want in a tiny morsel. I guess if you like American sized portions of diabetes you'd pick pie or cake, but you're so clearly wrong.

Wubbish mostly is what I've read here, imho.
Pies win. In individual and team events.
Pies offer the greatest variety of choices, eg who wants a steak and kidney donut, cookie or cake ? But a steak and kidney pie, it's a winner.

The only ones that are duds are the Collingwood Football Club, known as the Magpies, or pies, and even then you can shout out "Cold pies" which is a lovely taunting barb

And as has been hinted at, I think pie can be used in the greatest variety of euphemisms

I think pie wins just narrowly above cake to win it all.

I think the general consensus has been that cake is generally underwhelming. I must say I agree. Too often it's dry and tasteless, with much more tasteless icing than necessary.
I agree most with grumbledook's analysis. Pie is excellent for a desert if not needing t be transported. However, the ease of cookies makes it available in a wider combination of circumstances.

@Peregrine Falcon

I'd generally say i'm more underwhelmed by the average cookie than by the average cake. Cakes generally are a larger product and have some amount of effort put into them, whereas too many cookies i've bitten into have nearly poisoned my with disgusting raisins.

Furthermore, I'd like to submit to the conversation that Cheesecake is a definable cake, and thus it's superiority over cookies is reaffirmed. Also, cupcakes must be considered as smaller servings of cake, improving cake's quality as well

Lastly I believe that pie is only good on the initial serving, and looses it's marginal utility much faster with each extra piece of any other food here.

(Donuts and Brownies are irrelevant outside of breakfast and getting high)

@MajorMitchell

while I'm not a great fan of anything "kidney," steak pies are NOT good. Any human who prefers steak pies over a clean slab of meat, I have very little to no respect for. While it is more of a variety than the other options, overall it is still an inferior good.

Intitial, why not eat the whole pie?

Carrot cake immediately brings the standing of cake down considerably.

Actually I don't mind carrot cake. I find it tends to be a lot less dry than most other cakes.
Ice cream cake is really the best cake, however.

@TrPrado

good point on carrot cake, but cake does have variety good and bad, whereas Pie's "bad" may be comparable to cake's "bad" i truly believe that cake has more variety in the upper tier (cupcakes for transportable, cheesecake, chocolate, multilayer cake) than pie.

ALSO:

cookie cake... a hybrid of the ages

Cupcakes cannot be transported any easier than a slice of cake. They both tend to get squished. Cookies, on the other hand, are excellently transportable. It's true that there can be substandard cookies as well; they tend to get burnt and crispy if the person baking them is incompetent. However, any decent cook can make an excellent cookie, simply because of the simplicity and ease of baking them.

@PF

Nobody is arguing the deliciousness of well crafted cookies. this entire conversation has me starving. With that having been said, you are drastically underestimating cupcakes transportability.

James you miss my point, that is pies cover the widest range, with all types of meat, from steak, lamb, pork, chicken, kangaroo, goat, donkey, venison, horse and possum, and in the case of the pie shop below Sweeney Todd "s Barber shop....
And then there are all the " sweet" pies, Apple, apricot raspberry....

@MajorMitchell

I understand, but clearly the quality of the variety should be factored in as well. If I say "well there's shit cake which is cake made out of shit" sure that is more expansive than pie, but it's quality: eh.

My contention is that ANY meat placed into a pie is inferior to a separate dish of the same meet. beef pie? steak on plate. Chicken pot pie? Give me dem drumsticks. Donkey pie? Y'll know how much i like to eat dat ass

Pie does not improve - and in my opinion deteriorates - the quality of the meat it holds.

I do believe that sweet pie is a force to be reckoned with though.

Now if you're going to say "cake doesn't even put a contender on the field" I can accept that, which does overall increase the net good of pie, but i'm saying it's minimal in comparison to cake's variety within carrot cakes, fruit cakes, cheesecakes, cookie cakes, ice cream cakes and cupcakes

One can reasonably eat pie as dinner and therefore is superior. And then the best of pie is whatever you want.

Exhibit 2:
Fruit cake

Exhibit 3:
Cheesecake is clearly a pie, given its circular shape and use of crust.

Considering the best ice cream is cookie dough, theres not many cake ice creams, unless its ice cream cake. And pie and cake are only good with. Ice cream...