You're an asshole.

Asshole may not be accurate. He's a moron, however.

taos:

love is a fairy tale.

life is a bitter struggle and that's not going to change.

I wish you all the best.

redhouse

fat is disgusting and there should be a FAT TAX on all fat people especially on airlines

Fatphobia, the last socially acceptable form of bigotry.

"fat is disgusting and there should be a FAT TAX on all fat people especially on airlines
"

There already is. They're made to buy two seats because airlines make their seats for the anorexic. Fat people are denied proper medical care all the time, and routinely misdiagnosed. Thin people have such a sense of self-righteousness about health even if their diet consists of nothing but cigarettes and coke.

For once... I totally agree with ^@Putin33

Lol.. fatphobia..

Seats on airliners are perfectly fine for people with normal weight (and even for people who are somewhat obese.

People should stop blaming others for their own deficiencies and just start eating a bit healthier and walk 15-30 minutes a day. Same principle goes for smokers by the way.

not looking for advice on an online forum would be a good first step

Weight does not equal health. There are thin people with Type-2 Diabetes. There are thin people who don't work out at all. But they're assumed to be healthy.

He is neither a moron or an asshole...he's a human being. It's not his fault that he is not physically attrcted to her because of her weight. It's not a choice. He obviously cares for her and wishes he could be attracted to her...but isn't. If any of you cowards would take off your politcally correct hats for a second you would understand...and most likely agree.

If you are not physically attracted to her, then you sure as hell shouldn't marry her! Because you will regret it, you will be disatissfied (you ALREADY ARE) and most likely you will end up cheating on her (as you already are mentally whenever you see a skinny chick walk by...)

Now all the hypocrites may bash me...you know, all you that claim to be sexually attrcted to fat people, but aren't attracted to x y or z.

Speaking of which...how many of you fat-lovers who hate people that are not attracted to fat people are attracted phsyically to, say, a midget? Or a person with a terrible acne problem? Or maybe someone with a physical deformity, like a gimpy leg and a missing arm? Unless you idiots can say unequivically that you are attracted to *every* woman in the world, you are raging hypocrites. And if you ARE attracte to every woman in teh world, then you have a whole other set of emotional issues!

that got the conversation started

I didn't say that a normal weight or underweight equals health. Very thin people are assumed to be unhealthy, although it's unfortunately more socially acceptable than obesity.

Whereas a normal weight does not equal health, overweight does equal poor health. Just like anorexic people should eat a bit more obese people should eat a bit less, and should stop looking for excuses.

Damn,had to hit ESC so I could see it and I agree with redhouse and Putin. Maybe it's because I weigh 260 lbs (so definitely heavy for 6' tall) but Fatphobia *is* the only remaining "socially acceptable" form of bigotry.

As far as your problem taos. You don't have to find her attractive sexually to be friends, but you should find your wife attractive. And there is no harm in not finding *anyone* unattractive for any reason. It's a matter of personal preferrence. My brother is married to a girl of some 300+ lbs. He always dated plus sized ladies before he got married. That's what he likes.

Being 30 something is *not* a reason to get married. Marry because you want to share your whole life with *that* person and them alone. If this lady does it for you intellectually then you need to find a way to make the friendship work, but you should stop sleeping with her (it leads her on) and you should *not* marry her if you don't find her attractive in every way: emotionally, physically/sexually, and intellectually.

Sorry Putin, a *lady* of some 300+ lbs...

You'll notice krellin that no one discussing fatphobia here is saying that he should marry this woman. I don't want to speak for them all, but I think it's pretty clear that marriage would likely be a disaster.
That very obvious point aside, prejudice against fat people is definitely a thing.

Not that any of this will matter to you at all. Like usual you're just saying whatever to get people angry.

Too lazy to write the name of everyone who I should +1.

However, it must be said that there is also nothing wrong about finding larger people unattractive. You can't jump down someone's throat for having a specific idea of what they find pretty.

Taos was clearly pretty uncouth with his OP. He certainly lacks both politeness and English skills (and really, did you have to include cleaning skills?!). That being said, if he had phrased it better (and if this were a cosmo advice column) it could be a valid question.

And, lastly, there's also a large difference between fatphobia and the push to combat obesity in the NA. Unhealthy lifestyles *is* a very real issue and does need to be addressed.

@MR_rb - "People should stop blaming others for their own deficiencies and just start eating a bit healthier and walk 15-30 minutes a day. "

You are either a total ass or woefully unaware that many fat people (and I mean a significant percentage) have medical conditions that contribute to and are even the cause for their obesity and others have conditions unrelated to their obesity but that preclude exercise of a strenuous nature.

Take me. Yes, I'm a type-II diabetic brought on in part by my weight. But, my weight is due significantly to the fact that I have hypothyroidism. My thyroid produces little to no thyroxine. As such, I take artificial thyroxine, but the body doesn't process it as well as it's own natural stuff and the condition causes me to weigh such that, even with diet and exercise, I have only been able to get down to 260 from a high of 340. I've plateud there and just can't seem to lose any more.

So your assinine statement warrants either pity or contempt depending on the knowledge you had when you made it. Either way, it was a watse of bits and neurons posting it here.

" overweight does equal poor health"

Our measures of what constitutes being "overweight" are deeply flawed. The common measure is BMI, and it is most certainly not true that being overweight according to that index means being unhealthy. According to BMI, a majority of the NBA is considered "overweight". Few would dare claim that these athletes who engage in strenuous physical activity for a living are "unhealthy". According to BMI, it is considered "healthy" to be 6' tall and 140 pounds. That's absurd. My brother was 6'1 and 145 at one point (which is considered "normal", and he looked emaciated.

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,149807,00.html

"If the height/weight charts say you are 5 pounds too heavy, or even 50 pounds or more too heavy, it is of little or no consequence healthwise-as long as you are physically fit. On the other hand, if you are a couch potato, being thin provides absolutely no assurance of good health, and does nothing to increase your chances of living a long life."
-Steven Blair, P.E.D., Cooper Institute for Aerobics Research, 1997

I agree with the last putin comment. I'm about 5 lbs close to 'overweight' and am considered skinny by my peers (and have a noticeable six-pack without flexing). My weight is mostly in my back and legs which are unusually strong and bulky (mostly from track and weight lifting).
BMI is a bunch of bullshit.

Yeah also she is a "really good woman" because she "cleans"? I don't understand what the problem is. I thought larger women were considered attractive in the 19th century.

Mafialligator makes it into my profile! :D

I caught a lot of crap last week from a fat girls friends because I didn't take her home that night. I was laughing thinking of how that conversation would have went if a girl was given crap for not taking a fat guy home.

Alright OP, you listen to YJ cuz he's got all the answers.

You gotta milk that cow for all she's worth brother... the sex isn't so good? Just make her do increasingly degrading things to keep it fresh. Fat girls don't say no to that kind of thing. Behind on your rent? Fat girls love to give cash to guys who threaten to leave them. Want some variety? Just go cheat. Fat girls will ALWAYS take you back.

You gotta keep them giant panties locked down sir, because a fat girl is still a woman, and if you let her think she's pretty or special she'll start getting bitchy just like a normal girl does. Keep running her down so she knows she's your property and exists only to please you. Self esteem is the enemy of a productive fat girl relationship: it is a little known fact that self-esteem releases an enzyme that, when mixed with body fat, releases a deadly neurotoxin into the bloodstream, so keeping your hog "unhappy" is actually saving her life.

Keep these simple guidelines in mind and you too can have an amazing relationship with an exceptionally heavy woman.

The excuse of 'health' for fatphobia only seems to apply to women. It's quite acceptable for fat men to have traditionally "attractive" women hanging on their arm, which is what virtually every fast foot chain has in their ads. Ditto the number of television shows where men like Kevin James have wives like Leah Remini. There is a bountiful number of fat lead male actors but a dearth of female ones.

YJ is really a piece of shit.

Did she put on the "excessive" weight after you started dating? If not, why did you start dating if you found her unattractive?

I don't think this issue has anything to do with her being fat. You asked what should you do? You should break up with her and find someone to whom you are attracted. You should not marry her.

I don't think there's anything wrong with you not being attracted to her, for weight or whatever reason. Everyone's wired their own way. Just be glad you're not attracted to ten year old boys.

" I was laughing thinking of how that conversation would have went if a girl was given crap for not taking a fat guy home."

You're so oppressed.

Not quite, just tickled at the whole situation.