Ripping Yarns about Dipbro Brainbomb and Daffy Old Major Mitchell

[MajorMitchell]

A thread for Fledglings & Whipper-snappers to read Ripping Yarns about the Adventures of our Artist Dipbro Brainbomb & Daffy Old MM
Members of Webdiplomacy are encouraged to create and post Ripping Yarns.about these two lovable Scallywags

[brainbomb]

I feel like we probably have enough threads dedicated to us haha

[kingofthepirates]

hard agree bb <3 uwu ;3

boutta start my silly arc, wish me luck >:3

[MajorMitchell]

Travelling from our mortal, terrestrial world to the planet Blargon 7.3 requires the voyage across space & time into a Universe of contradictions and paradoxes, where the illogical is logical and vice versa, illusions are reality.

The evolution of the Blargonians in this unique environment has made them a extraordinary and extremely advanced civilisation.

The Blargonians chose me as their pet homo sapiens in 1943 because at the time I had none of the abilities or skills required for the role and therefore was the perfect choice ( the axiom of illogical being logical)

In 1943 as many whipper-snappers know I was busy fighting the Wicked Nazi Regime in Germany ruled by Dictator Adolf Hitler.

I had joined the Heroic RAF in early 1940 just after my One Hundred days and nights Honeymoon with my first wife Desdaemona, my Doctor recommended a less dangerous and stressful hobby and fighting in the War provided me with a much quieter Sanctuary from Marital Bliss.

In 1943 the RAF had the exceptionally good Lancaster bomber in operational use, with for Rolls Royce supercharged engines and superb flying performance.
The RAF gave me a shiny new Lancaster bomber as a Christmas gift at the end of 1942 and told me to.pick a crew and concentrate on attacking the Nazi Heinrich Himmler in 1943.

My personal style of piloting a Lancaster bomber inspired my gunners to always be alert and often using their guns yet most of the navigators took to drinking alcohol excessively during our flights and the crews were always had their parachutes handy.
The Navigators usually stayed coherent on the way to our targets, Heinrich Himmler's homes or offices but during the approach, bombing run when I turned on the extra floodlights I'd had fitted so the bomb aimer could view an illuminated target & attack the Navigators fearing imminent death would start drinking excessively.

The wascally German anti aircraft gunners would see our gloriously glowing Lancaster bomber diving down with four floodlights blazing white beams at Heinrich Himmler's library verandah and shoot in frenzied excitement at us.

Now diving into a hailstorm of tracer and other explosive projectiles in a big Lancaster with floodlights on high beam might seem extremely dangerous, but danger is a comparative thing and a recollection of my honeymoon as I commenced the bombing run was always sufficient to soothe my appreciation of the minimal comparative dangers posed by the German gunners below.

Plus the gunners below were obedient Nazis so when they instinctively held up their right or left hands to shield their eyes from.the bright floodlights and look under their extended hands at our Lancaster they always made a big mistake.

The first and important mistake.was they would subconsciously use a "Sieg Heil" salute position for their extended hand and consequently get their geometry angles of sight wrong.
Invariably they would fire a bit too high with too much "lead" the adjustment for speed of us, their target.
My staunch co pilot Blinky and I simply had to wiggle the Lancaster about a bit and stay just under the tracer going past the nose of our Lancaster but our somewhat less intelligent crews never quite grasped the concept intellectually.

So usually our Navigators became incoherent barely heavily inebriated semi concious passengers for the flight back to damp, cold Blighty and breakfast at Biggin Hill.

Which is why I had to start using a detour via the Moon on the way back to base in Blighty and in doing this was seen by the resourceful Blargonians.

Fortunately the mass of homo sapiens do not really believe that alien civilisations exist, they like the fantasy of the idea but fear the reality of it and with good reasons.

A superior alien civilisation will not reveal themselves to the human masses, they watch us without us seeing them and very occasionally hunt us for scientific purposes or catch and keep one of us as a pet.

All artists need to be tormented by visions of strange worlds to be proper artists , particularly painters.
That is why aliens have visited the mind of Dipbro Brainbomb and revealed visions of many things, the possibilities in the future for humanity etc.
So Dipbro Brainbomb is a proper artist and draws and paints his unique artworks.

What is the moral of this chapter of Ripping Yarns of Artist Dipbro Brainbomb and Daffy Old MM? the fledglings and whipper-snappers ask....

There is no moral message.
A long war did prepare me better for matrimonial Bliss yet I credit those benefits to the Charming Disposition of my first wife Desdaemona not Adolf Hitler and his military forces or myself.

[MajorMitchell]

Next Ripping Yarn..
Pickles Wisden, our cross eyed Bombadier who flew with Blinky in the Lancaster bomber in 1943 and 1944 then became a County Cricket Bowler and Bowling Coach after the war.

[JustAGuyNamedWill]

hard agree bb <3 uwu ;3

boutta start my silly arc, wish me luck >:3

kotp loredrop when

[kingofthepirates]

hard agree bb <3 uwu ;3

boutta start my silly arc, wish me luck >:3

kotp loredrop when

The day brain and major decide to end their wacky postings about the various intricacies of the universe permanently, that is the day an number of things will happen:
1) Hell will freeze over (Not indicative of my religion)
2) Prominent members of genus Sus will spontaneously grow wings, and begin to fly
3) We shall reach the elusive twelfth day of Never
4) We shall spend the day catching larks, for the sky fell
5) I shall drop lore

[MajorMitchell]

Thank you King of the Pirates for your kind words.

You mentioned Hell freezing over which is a commonly held myth about the Dominion ruled by Satan although you did not specify whether you referred to the Christian Hell or the Islamic equivalent.

I don't think I have told the fledglings and whipper-snappers about the time a when I was piloting a Lancaster bomber on a mission to Berlin in WW2 and after we had bombed Himmler's offices a grossly intoxicated Navigator gave me a course for the Christian Hell instead of a course home to Biggin Hill RAF base.

The sulphurous clouds of smoke emitted by burning Brimstone in the Christian Hell do present pilots with some challenging atmospheric conditions.

Yet it was an opportunity for me to wave to my first wife Desdaemona's dear old father Satan as we flew over him.
When I shouted "Daddy" in jest to the curmudgeonly blighter he was not as enthusiastic in his response as I had hoped and with a great fiery exhalation blew our Lancaster bomber back into our mortal, breathing World not far from the Isle of Wight and flying from there to Biggin Hill was a "cakewalk" and I got the Chaps home for a late breakfast of gruel and cold potato chips.

On subsequent visits to the Christian Hell to play golf with Satan and Mephistopheles I did learn how to putt quite well on charcoal "greens" which is a useful skill to aquire in my opinion.

[kingofthepirates]

I did learn how to putt quite well on charcoal "greens" which is a useful skill to aquire in my opinion.

That must've been a very rewarding experience! alas, I have not had the same opportunity. The only golfing I have participated in are those lovely little kiddie courses (one was even glow in the dark! I marvel at the technological genius of humanity...), and the legendary sports game, wii sports! oh how I long for those simple days, where I could return from a simple school day and boot up a totally-not-jail-broken wii (don't come after my ass nintendo), play some Totally Legal Tetris(TM), and wash my sorrows and struggles away with a simple game of bowling... truly, those were the days...

[brainbomb]

Blinky? Wasnt it Flippy?

[dargorygel]

Blinky Bill

[MajorMitchell]

Hooray, a three goals to none loss at field hockey with Yankalilla Hockey Club mens team on Saturday on Saturday after our Glorious ten goals to two goals Victory against Aldinga Hockey Club mens Blue team might seem.like a poor result for Yankalilla
Yet the Victor Harbor Hockey Club men's Blue team is the top side in the South Coast Hockey Association men's competition.
In this Hockey Association
Victor Harbor Hockey club have 3 men's teams, Blue, Grey and White and probably 2 or 3 women's teams
Aldinga Hockey Club have 2 men's teams Blue and White & probably 2 women's teams
Goolwa Hockey Club have one mens team & one women's team
Yankalilla Hockey Club have one mens and one women's team

A three goals to none loss against the team that is top of the competition was not a poor performance by Yankalilla, last season this Victor Blue team thrashed us, ten+ goals
We did play well, for the first time had 12 lads and men so I was able to interchange and get rests

I play as a Dashing High Striker as one winger with a very young whipper-snapper Macklin as the other High Striker / winger

We had our chances to score goals and put a lot of pressure on the opposition defenders & goalie
The opposition Goalie had to make an extremely good save to deny me a goal in the first half and I did receive "close marking" by the wascally young defenders

I had a lot of fun lurking around the goals and finding gaps to receive passes.
At half time in our discussions our full back Mark Baldock was making jokes to me about the way the opposition Goalie was "all over me" whenever I was lurking close to the goals and implied the goalie had carnal desires & I should be careful.
A few other team mates joined in telling me I had the opposition Goalie worried and the close marking I was getting meant other forwards were getting less attention from defenders and getting chances to score goals.

Very early in the second half I was by the left side of the goals looking away to the side & team mate with the ball, with goalie behind me, I received a nice pass but had the goalie and a full back behind me so instead of trying to turn around with the ball and shoot I decided to move away from the goals and draw the goalie wider, then pass the ball back to a team mate to have a shot.

I got the pass away just as the goalie tripped me up, I stopped moving forward and shoved me foward and clipped the back of my head with his Hockey stick so I dropped in protective posture to the lush grass after recent good rains for 2 weeks and the goalie went over the top of me.

I was OK but went off and let the interchange player go on while I had a rest and put a plastic bag of ice on my head where it had been clipped by the goalies hockey stick for a half minute.
I returned to the field after a few minutes and played OK
Then a similar incident with the opposition Goalie occurred, I was in the same spot, received a pass, the goalie was again right behind me as I moved to receive the pass, as I stopped the ball then immediately tried to pas it to a team mate the goalie gave me a shove and I got the pass wrong and there was some scramble play then the umpire blew his whistle and awarded us a penalty short corner and warned the opposition Goalie about pushing and shoving players.

The Victor Blue team were not happy that we were as competitive as we were and had been disputing umpiring decisions a few times, had one player sent off for 2 minutes in the first half fo dissent, a second player sent off for 5 minutes for dissent in second half.
It's only taken me about 50 years of playing hockey to adopt a friendly lack of care about poor umpiring decisions.
Plus I am now the oldest player on the field, the other players and umpires regard me as an eccentric grandpa.
Some of the 50 year old veterans of the competition remember playing as whipper-snappers against Yankalilla when I was in my 40s and a sometimes fiery character and deadly player with a lot more Dash and skills were fine tuned from playing in Adelaide A2/A2Reserves competitions with Flinders University Hockey Club.

When the goalie pushed me that second time in the second half and the umpire awarded us a penalty short corner the goalie had a whine and a few other defenders quibbled.
The umpire was firm in his rebukes to them.
Goalie denied pushing me.
Then I spoke up and said the goalie had pushed me and I had thought it might have deserved a penalty stroke or short corner but had said nothing at the time.

I went fishing last night and had mixed results, no fish and a big tangled mess of fishing line when using a second hand Abu Garcia Ambassador 7000 overhead reel

I have a 10ft Shakespeare Ugly Stik rod (one piece fishing rod, excellent surf fishing or rock fishing rod) that I got mid 1990s that I use with an Alvey deep dish reel
On Thursday I drove a long way, to Adelaide's northern suburbs to pay $Aus 70 for a second hand 10ft Ugly Stik rod & the 7000 overhead reel.

I will soon go fishing again, it's about 2.15pm Sunday local time.