Finished: 08 AM Sat 16 May 20 UTC
Private The Boyd
1 day /phase
Pot: 35 D - Autumn, 1905, Finished
Classic, Anonymous players, Sum-of-Squares Scoring
1 excused missed turn
Game drawn
02 May 20 UTC Spring, 1902: Perhaps if you had more people to talk to, mon amie.

Perhaps if your words did not drip distain and misguided arrogance.
02 May 20 UTC Spring, 1902: Die Franzosen reden alle, kein Angriff. Wie sagst du in deiner Sprache - alles bellen, kein Biss?
Vielleicht ist es dein kleiner Schlampenhund, der das Nippen für dich erledigt?
Ich denke, wir fragen uns alle, wer die Leine hält und wer sie trägt.
02 May 20 UTC Spring, 1902: I think perhaps you underestimate the value of talk, mon amie, and over-value bite.

Ahh but as we said "Chacun voit midi à sa porte". Perhaps you value words so little because yours are so worthless.
03 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: What happened in Burgundy? 2v2? Did France's army trying to advance on the Rhine break it's own hold from Paris? So that means you have to be holding to get the support of support holds?
03 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Yeah I think so, I misunderstood that, my mistake.
03 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: But good for everyone to confirm just so we all know whats up
03 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: So to clarify, you cannot support hold a unit that is attempting to move.

You CAN support hold a unit that is support holding, or convoying, according to reddit. Unsure about support attacking.
03 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Thanks for looking that up.
03 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: That is a weird rule. But then this game seems to throw them up a hell of a lot.
03 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Dieses Spiel ist für Männer, nicht für Jungen.
04 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Russland verrottet von innen.

Schade, dass Ihre herrliche Revolution jetzt nicht so herrlich ist?

Klopfen die letzten beiden Kräfte hilflos weiter an die geschlossenen Türen von Berlins Mauer, während Ihr Imperium zusammenbricht?

Hast du nicht 90 Jahre in die Zukunft gesehen?

Es gibt keine Hoffnung für diejenigen, die auf allen Seiten von Geiern umgeben sind. Wir warten nur auf den ersten Schlag in die Kehle
04 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: I'm sure we're all impatient but please, gentlemen, have a heart. It must be ever so difficult for our communist friends to decide which of their misguided divisions to leave to die in the snow.
04 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Check the date.. they are Romanovs... Not commies
04 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Well I suppose the hemophilia explains all the haemorrhaging.
05 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Christ on the cross, Queen Victoria is faster than you lot and she's dead!
05 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: GameMaster: Game was extended due to at least 1 member failing to enter orders and having an excused missed turn available. This has un-readied all orders.
05 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: Apparently one of our players is even later than the Queen...
06 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1902: GameMaster: Game was extended due to at least 1 member failing to enter orders and having an excused missed turn available. This has un-readied all orders.
08 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1903: Starting a vote for a draw...
08 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1903: Why? Has someone else quit?
08 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1903: No... we are Just not feeling it as much as we were. 48+ hours break then a country dropping dampened it for us a little.

Still happy to keep going, not giving up at all. But figured we would offer the idea.
08 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1903: GameMaster: Game was extended due to at least 1 member failing to enter orders and having an excused missed turn available. This has un-readied all orders.
08 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1903: I agree, I've been struggling to stay interested.
08 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1903: A couple of terrible people being terrible have definitely sucked away some momentum - but I'm really enjoying this game and don't want to call it
10 May 20 UTC Spring, 1904: Lenin is having a bad day. He sits in a nice, utilitarian bunker, constructed from bits and pieces repurposed from tsarist palaces and mansions and other decadent capitalist nonsense. He sighs deeply. Time to write the letters of last resort.

"Comrades, I have failed you. By the time you read this, the communist dream in Russia will be no more. I believed that the people of Austria shared that dream, and trusted them as true allies. But we were betrayed. Talk about freeing the peoples of the Balkans was nothing but a ruse to expand the Austrian empire. And, by the time we realised, trying to coordinate a defence with Turkey was impossible. Communication was entirely one-way, and the Ottomans were long gone. And then Lenin forgot how the rules of Diplomacy work, which didn't help.

"To Austria. You are the father of lies. I hope someone assassinates you, kicking off a war in Europe."

"To Germany. I can't believe you ended up with Sweden. Screaming. Also speak English ffs."

"To England and France. The two of you couldn't organise a piss-up in a brewery. Even with the help of a third power, Germany is still beating you. Honestly the most useless alliance I've ever seen in action."

"To Turkey. Useless. Possibly clinically dead, which is a better excuse than I can give."

"To Italy. My one true ally. Sort of. Shitaly reigns hard in this game. Try not to annoy the Austrians or you'll get squashed, little green bug."

And with that, the great comrade turns to the two young Americans he has brought over. They have a new invention, and he hopes they will be the 'right brothers' to manage his escape. Trotsky and Frida are coming too. The blood of the Red Army has drained from the Russian flag, rendering it a white flag of surrender. Time to head over the Urals and plan the revolution from Siberia. You haven't heard the last of Lenin!
10 May 20 UTC Spring, 1904: die vulgäre englische Sprache sprechen wie die niedergeborenen Schweine, die die Nordsee segeln und unsere Küsten überfallen? Die Deutschen werden so etwas nicht tun.
10 May 20 UTC Spring, 1904: lieber Bruder

Ich habe beunruhigende Gerüchte gehört, dass der Krieg im Norden nicht gut verläuft.

Die Kommandeure erzählen uns nicht viel, aber nach dem, was wir zwischen den Zeilen lesen, klingt es so, als würde die mächtige englische Flotte den Kontinent weiterhin mit ihren mächtigen Kanonen beschießen, unsere wunderschönen Küstendörfer verwüsten und sogar überfallen, wo sie können kalte Wintermonate für kostbare Vorräte.

Ich hoffe, es geht Ihnen gut und unser Dorf mit Mutter, Vater und den Schwestern ist diesen schmutzigen englischen Hunden nicht zum Opfer gefallen.

Was mich betrifft, ist das Wetter hier viel schöner. Wir haben es gerade ans Meer geschafft und sind in ausgezeichneter Gesellschaft - die Italiener sind gute Landsleute, und wenn dies alles vorbei ist, müssen wir sie auf ihre Gastfreundschaftsangebote ansprechen.

Die Franzosen sind auch so einladend, dass wir ihre Stadtplätze und die Herzen ihrer Leute von beiden Seiten mit solcher Kraft und Eile betreten haben, dass es einen atemlos macht.

Ich habe dem Leutnant gesagt, dass ich den Winter zwischen der Küste und einem französischen Kniepaar verbringen möchte, leider glaube ich, dass er bedeutet, dass ich die Pyrenäen überqueren soll


wie die Franzosen sagen, wenn sie auf dem Rücken liegen,
c'est la vie

Hans.
10 May 20 UTC Spring, 1904: Imbécile! When I said "Find the messenger and bring him to me" I meant the man who was to carry orders to Paris, not capture some idiot child soldiers mail!
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: In der westdeutschen Provinz gibt es einen Witz:

Möchten Sie lieber ein oder zwei Länder haben? immer zwei.

In der ostdeutschen Provinz gibt es einen Witz:

Was ist das schlimmste Land in Skandinavien? ist Schwede, denn Schwede ist Kartoffel.

Der Humor wird vielleicht nicht übersetzt, aber die Pointe ist England.

Diese Witze werden im glorreichen Deutschen Reich erzählt, das sich vom Polarkreis bis zum Mittelmeer erstreckt.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Thrilled to have thwarted Austrian plans one last time, even when my ally is literally dead.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Emperor-King Franz Joseph I of the Austro-Hungarian Empire applauds the Russian rabble's last, meaningless act of defiance. We hope that the noble fighting spirit of the Russian people will flourish under proper governance.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: One of the ment questions I have from that round: is the Anglo-French alliance on shaky ground with the attempted invasion on Belgium, or was that a highly coordinated effort to keep the Huns out.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: > was that a highly coordinated effort

The answer has already been given.

I will, for your benefit, explain in longer form with evidence.

Belgium is known for Frites and Beer. We germans have been there before many times, and will be there also in the future. in fact, We recommended the french people try the local produce as early as 1901

The French have been so hospitable to the germans recently, first we drunk their wines in Burgundy and then were thirsty for their women in marseillie. They have been so.... accomodating for the german soldier. To recipirocate we invited them warmly in private diplomatic channels to famous Munich Beer houses for Oktoberfest last Autumn, so they may enjoy a taste of Delicious beer - and a fleeting taste of victory, given their dismal defeats elsewhere.

They can confirm this message was privately sent before the winter if they want, but we germans are nothing but truthful.

However, back to what is brewing in Belgium.

It appears that the French currently control the lowlands, and would invite their ragged allies the english to join them on a cold winter's night for a warming pint and a hearty meal.

Alas! it was not be! the navy that prides itself on sailing the treacherous north sea can not even navigate across the narrow channel to dunkirk.... a distance men from stronger nations have swum!

So. We Germans are nothing but hospitable. Meanwhile, the French and English - well, russia put it best:

>... England and France. The two of you couldn't organise a piss-up in a [Belgian] brewery.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Scheisse! Die Übersetzer haben mich im Stich gelassen. Wir werden über den Winter richtige Diplomaten einstellen.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Alas mon amie, we shall never know what devilish machinations occurred.

Your basic premise is of course what lets you down. Your so called Anglo-French alliance exists only in the heads of weak fools who must invent reasons for their failures, and boast at their modest accomplishments as if they were mighty feats.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: > was that a highly coordinated effort

Die Antwort wurde bereits gegeben.

Ich werde zu Ihrem Vorteil in längerer Form mit Beweisen erklären.

Belgien ist bekannt für Pommes und Bier. Wir Deutschen waren schon oft dort und werden auch in Zukunft dort sein. Tatsächlich empfahlen wir den Franzosen, bereits 1901 die lokalen Produkte zu probieren

Die Franzosen waren in letzter Zeit so gastfreundlich gegenüber den Deutschen, dass wir zuerst ihre Weine in Burgund getrunken haben und dann nach ihren Frauen in Marseille dürsteten. Sie waren so ... zuvorkommend für den deutschen Soldaten. Zur Rückmeldung haben wir sie im vergangenen Herbst herzlich in privaten diplomatischen Kanälen zu den berühmten Münchner Bierhäusern zum Oktoberfest eingeladen, damit sie einen Vorgeschmack auf köstliches Bier genießen können - und einen flüchtigen Vorgeschmack auf den Sieg, angesichts ihrer düsteren Niederlagen an anderer Stelle.

Sie können bestätigen, dass diese Nachricht vor dem Winter privat gesendet wurde, wenn sie wollen, aber wir Deutschen sind nichts als wahrheitsgemäß.

Zurück zu dem, was in Belgien gebraut wird.

Es scheint, dass die Franzosen derzeit das Tiefland kontrollieren und ihre zerlumpten Verbündeten, die Engländer, einladen würden, sich ihnen in einer kalten Winternacht zu einem wärmenden Bier und einer herzhaften Mahlzeit anzuschließen.

Ach! es war nicht sein! Die Marine, die stolz darauf ist, die tückische Nordsee zu segeln, kann nicht einmal über den engen Kanal nach Dunkirk navigieren ... eine Entfernung, die Männer aus stärkeren Nationen geschwommen sind!

Damit. Wir Deutschen sind nichts als gastfreundlich. Inzwischen die Franzosen und Engländer - nun, Russland hat es am besten ausgedrückt:

>... England and France. The two of you couldn't organise a piss-up in a [Belgian] brewery.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Ah, I see the point is made on cue.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Indeed, so the great specter you have been fighting was never really there at all. I did tell you.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Ich habe nur die Fragen Italiens beantwortet - ich glaube nicht, dass es ein Bündnis gibt, weil ich glaube, dass es überhaupt keine Koordination gibt.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: There must be some sort of arrangement between the two of them, they're clearly deep in discussions about which armies to disband. A difficult decision I imagine, but surely not one that takes quite so much time.
12 May 20 UTC Autumn, 1904: Disband? We are still in the retreats phase my friend. For France there is only one option, so unlikely the issue, for England there are many many options and doing it twice no less...
13 May 20 UTC Spring, 1905: Pleased to see there are still some Russian partisans in Silesia, Prussia, Livonia, Ukraine and Armenia. Now if only anyone had thought to give them guns...
13 May 20 UTC Spring, 1905: Armenia is Russian, and Syria is Turkish. Nothing could wrong if those two occupying forces switched.
14 May 20 UTC What a disturbing turn of events, those we thought were fast friends, the Italians and the Germans have betrayed the people of Austria, ungrateful for all we have done for them.

After finally finding success against the French, the fickle Italians abandon their new territory and seek to turn on their only true friend. How could anyone trust them again after such foolish and unnecessary treachery? What thoughts were going through their minds when they decided to abandon their scant progress to the west in order to become the dancing monkey of their former enemies? The enemies of Austria may have won a new ally, but a traitor is hard enough to trust, an imbecile even more so.

Our German cousins have been even more perfidious. After years of cooperation and support, even in their actions against the English, they now cooperate with them against us. Handing over hard won lands in exchange for no net gains and the loss of a stalwart friend. For shame cousin, for shame.

And then we have the bizarre actions of the French... Not only have they made a deal with the Italians for the return of lands they were unable to hold, but they now cede great swathes of southern France to the sweaty sausage eaters? Will the people of France forgive their short-sighted leaders for letting the treacherous Huns lay waste to their heartlands? Surely the French government that rolls over and barks on command for their German masters cannot expect to be treated kindly by either its own people or by history. As to why that government has moved its base of operations to Vichy, we are still unsure...

The only upstanding actions appear to be those of the English, though whether their honour will allow them to remain in lockstep with their disgraceful allies of convenience remain to be seen. Winters on the continent can be harsh and, as we have seen this year, the words of trusted allies can quickly become knives in backs of the righteous.
14 May 20 UTC "The words of trusted allies can quickly become knives in backs of the righteous." The fucking hypocrisy, I swear to god...
14 May 20 UTC We had an agreement with the former leaders of Russia to make sure that the Turks never threatened civilised Europe. Unfortunately those leaders failed to live up to their end of the bargain. Thankfully they were stopped and overthrown before they could sell out all of Europe. Fortunately the noble Russian people were quick to join the safety and security of the Austrian Empire.
14 May 20 UTC Der österreichische Führer hat an der Kunstschule versagt, und jetzt sehen wir, wie er an der Politik versagt.
14 May 20 UTC There's an old saying in Russia, "Austria is such a knob".
14 May 20 UTC There is a new saying in Austria, "What is a Russia?"
14 May 20 UTC We grew tired of something for you, but nothing for me..

Start Backward Open large map Forward End

Austria
Drawn. Bet: 5 D, won: 22 D
13 supply-centers, 12 units
Italy
Tomasnz (157 D)
Drawn. Bet: 5 D, won: 5 D
6 supply-centers, 5 units
England
Crako (135 D)
Drawn. Bet: 5 D, won: 4 D
5 supply-centers, 4 units
France
Freeboots (100 D)
Drawn. Bet: 5 D, won: 4 D
5 supply-centers, 5 units
Germany
Tharax (125 D)
Drawn. Bet: 5 D, won: 4 D
5 supply-centers, 6 units
Turkey
Builder26 (100 D)
Defeated. Bet: 5 D
Russia
Gothblin (100 D)
Defeated. Bet: 5 D
Civil Disorders
Builder26 (100 D)Turkey (Autumn, 1902) with 4 centres.
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