Who Needs Enemies with Friends Like These?

R Danger D, Jualter, quiptheip, redfury, WhiteFlag, Orion124, signorehopkins

06 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: No joke! At least during the Cold War people believed something.
06 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Although never displayed publicly, at the beginning of WWII the UK Ministry of Information created a poster to help raise citizens' moral against the inevitable threat of invasion. I think it applies here as well: http://i.imgur.com/X8gNkdD.jpg Also, it was actually part of a series of images. I think the third one in the series is the message I'd like to send to my allies who believe that Diplomacy still matters: http://i.imgur.com/3o0n1L8.jpg You will bring us all victory.
06 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I found the definition of ally on Dictionary.com and thought it was appropriate to share... to unite formally, as by treaty, league, marriage, or the like (usually followed by with or to ): Russia allied itself to France.
06 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Russia, you out there? I'm just saying...it's in the definition.
06 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I'm not sure why England is so upset about all these alliances. I seem to remember him posting this via Facebook: "Warning to everyone: If I get England, I will forfeit alliances all together and go solo"
06 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I'm sorry if this game hasn't been going as well as all would have liked. But I have a side to the story too. I had a fortunate first year or so where I was able to get some good territory and positioning. I had an agreement with Austria, and I felt this would be a good friendship where we could tackle common enemies and have peace with each other. I also saw a friendship with England, since France was a threat against me. However, I got a message of "join England and Russia or die" where England would rally up England, Russia, and France all against me. I was reluctant at first since I knew I couldn't handle 3 enemies at once, but then I was told that places I wanted would be unavailable to me because they would be reserved for England. These are places I had worked to get to myself, and I wanted something to show for it. I was willing to help England out, but I can't say I was willing to be a puppet or an extension or colony of England.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I have a couple of responses to Joe. 1) This is a game of continental domination and the arena is limited. If you aren't allied with someone, then you are likely fighting them. As such, when one says, they are offering them an alliance, it goes without saying that in the absence of one, you are liable to attack. 2) You wanted all the territories! Looking back on the conversation, you wanted St. Petersburg, Sweden, and all of France. The only countries you noted for me were Portugal and Spain. Where was I supposed to go? 3) One of the things I was trying to get you to do during our time together was to get you to start thinking about the game systematically with an overall vision of the whole game, not just in the beginning, but in the end as well. From there, I tried to get you to think about how your movements and tactics would get you from point A to point B. I was trying to break you of the habit of thinking only about your most immediate move; instead, I tried to get you to think 3 or 4 moves ahead. That is the kind of discipline and direction that I was trying to get you to focus on. At one point, I asked you the direction you wanted the game to go within our partnership. You listed off a laundry list of things you wanted to do, but did not give any thought to the fact that it was a collaborative effort. As I mentioned to you before, alliances are designed for the sake of mutual gain. The strongest alliances are those where the parties involved benefit equally. Our case is, in many ways, ideal given that I had a largely naval fleet and you had most an army. Therefore, it makes sense for you to take the landlocked countries and me the coastal. That is good strategy. But, when I tried to get you to think in those terms, you bristled. That is most likely because of..... 4) One of the things that Todd astutely noted in his end of game summary from the last game was that it is foolish to compartmentalize your alliances because it ultimately creates too many conflicts of interest down the road. It also leaves you vulnerable to being manipulated by other players, which I suspect was part of the reason we also had issues. I am still not sure who told you I was planning on attacking you, but that was categorically untrue (I also find that kind of lying on the part of whomever told you that distasteful, even in a game of simulated war). I only made the decision that our alliance was not working after you told me you struck a deal with Austria to take out Russia. I as said with France after he went missing for several days, I was bummed that our alliance did not work out. I went into it with the best intentions, but ultimately it began to negatively affect my game. I hope we can try it again at some point in the future.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: That's good to hear, Joe! Then you can be a French puppet. Wouldn't you like to be a puppet for France? We'll start by unlearning the English language…filthy habit...and replacing it with the beautiful French language. Also, we give free tank driving lessons…but only in reverse. All of our tanks go the opposite way from where we point them. :-)
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Stepping out of character for a moment, let's have a serious discussion about this game. First, now that we all thoroughly hate each other, let's have a BBQ or something soon. It would be fun to connect in real life. And Second, why isn't anyone talking about our most serious mutual failure in this game. The one area we should be shamed and saddened by: Italy. Did nobody care to offer him a map? Did nobody give him advice? When he drove his army into the wilds of North Africa, did anyone offer him a tank of gas? When he sailed his fleet against an undefended Spain, did nobody make hotel reservations? When he crossed the street from Venice to Picardy, was nobody there to hold his hand? We've all failed him and should all feel deep deep shame and sadness for his untimely loss.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I request a formal moment of silence for him. Preferably a long moment. At least long enough to become slightly awkward, and require shifting uncomfortably in your seat while you wonder if the lady two rows over is weeping or if she just fell asleep and is snoring. And there should be sad music from the 80's playing in the background, but not country music, because that's too depressing.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: And there should be a baby crying in the back ground, because that's how it happens in the movies.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Also Germany - it is 11:00. If you could hit ready, we'd be nicely back on track.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Err, France. Sorry. You all look the same and smell funny.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I sent Italy several messages asking if he had questions about the game and tried to offer him advice. He never responded.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I agree! I'm not sure if anyone knew this, but Jeremy was Italy. He likely didn't understand all the nuances of the game, hence the occasionally odd movements ;)
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: That seems to be a recurring theme lately. Are you sure your chat is working correctly? :P (Was the moment of silence over? I'm assuming it was over)
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Really? Who was Ben? I'm so confused now.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Ben must not have been playing...
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: I'm going to start a rumor that England is Ben.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Hmm, Big Ben is in England....good enough for me, I'll believe it.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Makes sense that you are the one who would start a rumor.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Ryan must have been Australia, then.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Does that explain why his strategy maps are all upside-down?
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: And in light of England's jab, I'd like to start another rumor: England starts dirty nasty rumors, and every rumor you hear came from him, including this one. :P
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: The Aussie fleet is in Antarctica, wondering where the hell everyone is.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: Aussie fleet goes to 'black tie' welcoming event only to find flock of penguins.
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: So, going back to the 'lets have a BBQ' idea, I'll be in town in June (approx the 7th-15th)
07 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1904: That is, if everybody has had sufficient time to cool down from the game :)
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: I vote we draw the game.
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: I think a BBQ is a fine idea. To be clear, at least one my end, the frustrations I have are with this game, and they do not extend beyond this online forum.
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: *on
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: Draw the game? I heard Australia tried to draw the game once, but all his crayons had frozen in the arctic wastelands.
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: And yes, I would hope nobody is taking anything from this game personally. (If you're Australian, and I've offended you, let me know so I can apologize).
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: I'm not Australian, but I am playing as Australia in this game in addition to France. I think you should apologize to me…
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: I'm happy to hear that we can all be friends in real life! Any attacking I do here is just as a game. In real life, I have all of your backs. I think this is a very good, solid group of friends. I'm impressed that we've been friends and have stayed in contact for the last 10-15 years.
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: But if you have a BBQ, let me know! I'll be in Colorado slightly in mid June. I don't know if I'll have time to make it to the Loveland area or not. But I miss all you guys.
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: Ditto. Although, I do wish we could have drawn the last game when I had the Spanish navy up my Royal British rear! :-)
07 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: World (Group) hug!!!!
08 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: So France, on turn two?
08 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1905: Yep! We should just draw on turn two every game before we can tell who's going to win or lose.
12 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1906: "All the air has gone out of the world and all that's left is silence."
16 May 14 UTC	Spring, 1907: “Mankind must put an end to war or war will put an end to mankind.”
17 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1907: OK world. As per our agreement(s), this is the end of the game. However some/most/all of you have expressed interest in contiuing further. So here's the deal - lets vote: do we draw now and start a new game? Or do we continue on? if we vote to continue - consider it a restart of all alliances and agreements. so it may end in 1v1v1v1, 2v2, or 3v1.
17 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1907: I vote to draw. I was planning on that, and I had been playing accordingly these last rounds. Besides, a new map may be nice to have. I like the new games where you get a couple free supply centers without fighting. It builds my self esteem to build up my armies! Again, my vote is a solid draw.
18 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1907: Hehe, I'm down for a draw but am happy to continue as well.
18 May 14 UTC	Autumn, 1907: I would like to continue, but am happy to draw if that's what everyone wants :)
18 May 14 UTC	I still want to draw. I left some borders open thinking we were going to draw by now. I'm pretty screwed if we keep going.
18 May 14 UTC	You left your borders open because it was the smart thing to do or Russia/England would have conquered you from the north!
18 May 14 UTC	Thanks, everybody.
18 May 14 UTC	Well played everyone!